Hugo's Blogspotting: 15 May

Envy

One constant in the poker world is envy. How often have you heard that the latest big winner of a tournament is actually a terrible player who just got lucky? In my never-ending search for the ultimate poker blog I came across this article about Annette_15. Now I might be going out on a limb here, but I’m guessing the author, Eric, is a tad envious of Miss Obrestad’s recent results.

“The opportunity that was given to players in Europe to play in the World Series, in my view, should never have happen. But it did. So now we have history made outside of the World Series of Poker traditions. The first woman to win a main event should have happened here, in the United States at the “traditional” main event. The age of the players also comes into question as that also breaks tradition and falls outside of the laws of the United States that states the legal gambling age to be 21.”

Er…yeah, ok. The World Series of Poker should only be played in the United States. Right. And because they held a £10k event ($19,400 at today’s current rate, so maybe the WSOPE Main Event is more prestigious than the ME in Vegas) in London where they have different laws regarding the age of gambling it doesn’t count? I mean, really, what is this guy on about?

“I recently read one of the first one on one interviews with Annette Obrestad. The deeper I read into this article the more my juices started to boil. If this young lady wanted to insult poker and its established professionals, she succeeded in doing just that. After playing only 10 live events she has the audacity to state that she is a better player than the pro’s she played against.”

Insult poker and its established professionals? This guy is having a laugh isn’t he? Talk about pompous. He must be a spokesperson for all the poker pros out there. How dare a 19 year old girl play better than a bunch of live pros. How dare she not look up to them. Does this Eric not realize that Annette has probably played more hands than a lot of these professionals?

It reminds me of Jim McManus telling Elix Powers that he was disrespecting the game because he (Powers) wanted to straddle at the limit Holdem final at the WSOP.

Eric goes onto write that many players experience the early results only to inevitably end up busto. Of course this could happen to Annette, but I think it’s unlikely. Eric however is sure of it and seems to know why.

“Hopefully Annette will learn from the experienced poker players. Oh wait, she doesn’t read poker books, use math in her decisions or take poker lessons. So guess she’ll have to learn the hard way.”

Like I say, envy is a constant in the poker world.

Rio on Red Alert

Unsurprisingly, the WSOP ME Final Table Delay is still a hot topic. Andy Ward has been looking through the threads on the subject at 2plus2 and discovered a hilarious over-reaction from poker agent and regular 2plus2er Olivert.

“I am talking about Super Bowl-style security precautions, i.e. snipers on the roof above entrances; metal detectors and bomb-sniffing dogs at entrances to screen every spectator, player, and media member; solid barriers in the parking lots to prevent truck bombs from approaching the building, helicopters and/or fighter jets patrolling the building from above to prevent kamikaze pilots and 9/11-style suicide hijackers from crashing planes into the building deliberately, etc. The security threat has gone up substantially from previous years in my opinion. There are too many people who are upset with the WSOP organization for moving the WSOP Main Event final table to November."

Yes I can picture that - An irate poker player flying a plane into the Rio because he is irked about the final table being played out in November. Actually that’d be a bit silly because the Amazon room is in the Rio’s convention centre which is not a very tall building if I recall, though I suppose he’d still be declaring Jihad on Harrahs.

It's Only a Game

For the final word on the Delay, look no further than Amy Calistri’s blog. She heads her post with a quote from North Dallas Forty, an old film which had a rather jaded view on the NFL.

“Every time I say it’s a game, you tell me it’s a business.
Every time I say it’s a business, you tell me it’s a game.”

How apt. Calistri goes onto write something that I think many long time players might relate to.

“I liked poker before it was popular; before it was a business. And maybe, just maybe, I liked it because it wasn’t mainstream. It was my secret world.”

That is so true. It used to be that if you met a fellow poker player back in the old days you had met a kindred spirit, nowadays it’s more surprising if they don’t play poker.

It’s easy to wax nostalgic about poker’s past, especially now that it has lost it’s cult status. When the masses and hoi-palloi get hold of something they always ruin it don’t they? The irony is that back in the day players used to complain that the game was dying, when the boom happened it didn’t take long for the complaining to start. After all, every poker player loves to moan.

The new irony is that it looks like maybe poker is dying again, so maybe some of us are secretly hoping normal service will resume. But you can never go back. Poker is a sport now, at least that’s what ESPN and Harrahs want it to be. Poker is gambling and gambling is a hustle and hopefully that is the one thing that will save the game from being neutered by these sterile corporations.

“I love the old ESPN WSOP footage; documentaries of a game, not the entertainment business that it has become.”

Legalise It!

Having said that poker might be going through a second death, there is of course a good possibility that online poker will be legalized again in America. Matt Maroon has written a good blog about an issue that all poker sites should take notice of. How to get your money on the site and be playing as soon as possible.

“I vaguely remember reading that in the early days of PayPal they discovered that each new step they introduced caused 30% of people to give up. That's enormous. To put that another way, eliminating one step would grow their signup rate by nearly 50%.”

When you’ve got a hot sucker on the line and they want to play why make them jump through hoops to get their action? Maroon breaks it down for us:

“To play at a site you have to do the following things:
1. Go to the website and download the software. (There are web based versions, but not many, and they suck.)
2. Install.
3. Create your account. Input user name, password, email address.
4. Verify your email address.
5. Input all necessary information for a real money account. Address, phone number, etc., some of which may have to be verified by a phone call or a code in the mail.
6. Input checking account and routing number.
7. Wait a few days for the site to EFT a small deposit into your account.
8. Check your bank statement to see what the deposits were.
9. Input them into the poker site.
10. Fund poker account.
11. Wait a few days for the e-check to clear.”

Phew! What a hassle. Even worse, as I’m sure many of you out there know, is when you try to cash out; that’s even more of a palaver at most sites. Sending them the passport and driving license and all that crap, why do people even bother playing online? Lucky for these poker sites most players are sickos and most of them don’t win…

Hugo 'Chimney Sweep' Martin

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