Hugo's Blogspotting: 28 February

Luck is Expensive

Many jokes have been made about poker players’ lack of hygiene and I can certainly remember sitting next to some world class non-bathers in my time, especially when playing in downtown Vegas. Obviously these degenerate gamblers don’t have the time for a shower as they need to get to the cardroom ASAP.

Doyle Brunson offers another explanation on his blog why sometimes in a game you might have to deal with an unpleasant whiff.

“Superstition is a strange thing. It seems gamblers are more inclined to be superstitious than most people. I have known poker players who wouldn’t change their clothes, even their underwear, when on a winning streak. I try to sit upwind from them when they are doing that.”

Sometimes it’s not as easy as that Doyle. I remember having to leave a great Dealer’s Choice game in Paris once due to one player’s smelliness. No other seats were available and seeing as I was gagging I had no other choice but to get up.

Doyle goes onto write about his card protector named Caspar and how he made a nice sideline in renting out this “lucky” card protector.

“I would charge them $500 every thirty minutes which seems ridiculous but when you are playing very high stakes poker, was considered to be reasonable. It went on and on and finally Casper was rented for $5,000 for an hour to a poker player from Greece.”

It seems this Caspar possesses such talismanic qualities that no less a player than Howard Lederer has negotiated with the Big Poppa to leave Caspar to him in his will!

But the story isn’t over yet – Brunson’s daughter has done well in a load of tournaments with Caspar protecting her cards so now Doyle has had to buy Caspar back from Lederer. Who was it that said being superstitious is unlucky?

The Art of Procrastination

As usual Brandon Adams delivers a good read at Always Bluff. There’s not much poker or gambling content this week, but Adams still has something to say that I suspect many poker players can relate to.

This week he took an exam and especially put aside time from his various high stakes pursuits in order to study for said test. Obviously a top poker player has the concentration and discipline to cram a load of knowledge in a few days that would take most other people a couple of weeks, right?

“…to make matters worse I was perhaps the most undisciplined I’ve ever been during a study period. It’s tedious stuff and not particualy easy to focus on, but I did a horrendous job. I might have studied 9 hours total over four days. I mean, I can’t even recount the various proscratinations. At one point, I spent four hours reading Rolling Stones magazine, including a 10000-word article on Britney Spears.”

Yes I remember trying to revise for exams (that it turns out were completely meaningless – I was right all along!) and suddenly finding the most trivial and banal magazine articles/TV programs/menial tasks utterly riveting. Thank God there was no internet poker back in the early 80s (yes, I’m showing my age here).

Poker According to DY

Meanwhile David Young has updated his blog and for once he has written about poker. Not bad considering he’s a professional poker player. Anyway, he makes a load of good points and observations including the following:

“One of the key advantages of online play is that it deals many more hands per hour than the live game. I’m all for speed, so can I suggest that online sites with a large contingent of Scandinavian tournament players install an ‘Auto-Squeeze’ button?”

Or how about David’s novel way of solving the drugs problem in Britain?

“All the government has to do is legalise all drugs, on condition that they can only be distributed at British casinos. Ensure that card room managers are put in charge of customer service and sit back and watch the fun. Picture the scene if you will. A keen newbie junkie comes to the room and asks to be put on the list for Heroin

Manager: Sorry, but we don’t have any dealers yet. If you wait a couple of hours we might.

Junkie: But I want some now.

Manager: We’ve had three dealers phone in sick today and I can’t get any more from the pit bosses. Etc”

Anybody who has ever played at the Vic will relate to that one…

He also has an interesting viewpoint on “City Boys” playing poker. Most people would think that traders and stockbrokers with piles of money taking up poker would be a good thing.

“In my experience, City Boys tend to come to card rooms only when they are with a few friends from the same career and whilst totally pissed. They only want to play for a couple of hours and are incredibly slow. They are also the worst slow-rollers you’ll find anywhere and seem to think that giving people the rub-down when they beat them is part of the game.”

The Art of Slow-Rolling

Talking of slow-rollers Kevin “BeL0WaB0Ve” Saul at PokerRoad.com has run into a couple at the L.A. Poker Classic. The first guy is just a bit of an idiot, but the second guy brings a new twist to the art of slow-rolling.

“Then in yesterday's event at the 25-50 level, I had chipped up to about 7.5k when I opened for 150 chips with pocket kings, got 2 callers and the button moved in for roughly 5.7k LOL. Sorry, I don't fold pocket kings in these shallow stack tournaments, so I announced I was all-in too. The other 2 players folded, and the button, with a worried look on his face says, "Did I run into Aces?" I shrugged and told him I didn't have aces, flipped over my kings only to have him flip over his pockets aces and say, "few, I thought I was gonna have to split this pot."

Now that’s just plain rude. Of course it’s rare that you meet a poker player with manners so one shouldn’t be surprised, but I have to say I’ve never heard anyone say that before…

Who is Hustling Who?

Finally, let’s take our regular glimpse at how the other half live with a quick look at Patrik Antonius’ blog. Unusually there’s no write-ups about big pots that he has won although he saw something that I’m sure many players dream about.

“One of the most amazing things I have ever seen in the Bellagio happened that night as well. One of the players in the $40-80 mix game right outside Bobbys Room just walked right into Bobby's Room and sat down at our table, pulled out a bunch of $5000 and $25,000 chips and played with us for about seven hours. He was straddling every hand and moving chips as fast as he could. He ended up winning over $200,000.”

I assume that was a player just taking a shot and a successful one at that. Why is it whenever I take a shot at a bigger game I end up doing my bollocks?

Elsewhere Antonius writes about playing golf with Phil Ivey. Interestingly, vast sums of money were not wagered on this match. What kind of metagame was being played here?

“Phil was trying as hard as he could to not score well himself. He played some of the worst golf he has ever played and I am sure next time we play, he will not want to give me any shots. I will not fall for his hustling, so don't worry about me.”

Hmmm, what price do you give me that the negotiations at the next match will take longer than the game itself?

Hugo 'Chimney Sweep' Martin

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